Acne is something that has become so normalized in society, no one (except those who have it) really understands how dealing with it is not as simple as, "cutting out sugar", "drinking more water", "washing your face", etc. While those remedies can work and help, acne still goes far beyond that. What many also often fail to see is that, having acne is not just a physical struggle, it is equally an emotional one as well.
The emotional struggle is widely connected to the looks, comments and blaming that happens when you have acne. I don't know how many times I had aunt's come up to me and look at me as if I had a disease. Or how many times I got, "You have a pimple on your face", or "What's wrong with your face?!", or "Your skin is so bad...". And at the end of the looks and the comments, it was always, "You're not doing ____ enough", or "You need to take care of your skin", or "You should do this or that if you want to clear up...". It's easy for the other person to blame you for your skin, as if you have control over it!
There's a lot that I wish I could tell the younger me, but since that opportunity is over, I hope that my mistakes and lessons can help you with your skin journey or perhaps help you better understand those who may be dealing with acne.
1. Make up is a bandaid solution
For girls, we have the benefit and curse of make up. We can head on over to our local drug store and pick up an array of products to help cover up and conceal those annoying pimples and blemishes. This was an option I took. Over the years I have invested hundreds of dollars on make up to cover up and give off the illusion of clear skin. What I failed to see was, my confidence became dependent on it. I wouldn't leave my house or let anyone see me (aside from my immediate family) without make up. Not even my best friends or my boyfriend. While make up can give us confidence and make us feel better about ourselves for a short while, what we need to remember is make up is taken off at the end of the day and what's left is you. Naked faced you. And just like a bandaid when you rip it off, there's pain that, you're not the person you want to look like.
I would tell the younger me... You can use make up if you'd like, but don't get so dependent on it. Stay comfortable with how you look without make up so you don't feel the need to constantly put it on or that you can't let people see you without it. If you always put make up on, that becomes the "normal you" for them and makes it difficult to be open about your skin when it's not covered up.
2. Your family doctor is not a dermatologist
While you family doctor can be helpful in prescribing, their specialization is not in skin. For years, my parents were consistent in that seeing the family doctor was good enough, and it wasn't! Seeing a dermatologist makes all the difference in the help and advice you can get. Going to a family doctor got me "one-size fits all" or "it's just a phase" remedies, where the dermatologist individualized and looked deeper into my situation. Also, dermatologist are the only ones who are able to prescribe accutane.
I would tell the younger me... Be more persistent in seeing a dermatologist. Don't limit yourself to a doctor that knows a little about a lot, but not a lot about one thing. See a dermatologist! And ASAP! They're skin doctors for crying out loud, go see one! Accutane works, don't be afraid. It will clear up your skin well!
3. You are not to blame.
I hated myself for being me. I blamed my eating habits, my exercise habits, my dirty hands for touching my face, the pillow case I chose to sleep on, etc. I thought it was all my fault and always wondered what I had done to deserve such a struggle.
I would tell the younger me... It's not your fault, blame genetics. I guess somewhere along our gene pool, acne was added, passed down, and inherited by you. While some of your choices may contribute to your acne, it is not the main cause. Acne is widely an internal thing, not external. It is not your fault, it is not your fault, it is not your fault. Don't blame yourself.
4. You are beautiful.
Within today's society, it's easy to feel ugly. I think Selena Gomez and Beyonce have their days or moments where they too feel ugly, but we all know they are two very beautiful women... and so are you. Sometimes we need to remind ourselves of that and not get so obsessed with how our skin is or looks like.
I would tell the younger me... While acne may be a part of your life, don't make it your life. Don't depend your beauty on entirely how you look. Inside is what matters and I don't mean that in some cliche way. You don't need clear skin to have friends, a boyfriend, a career, fun, love, respect, etc. You can achieve all that by simply being you, whether you got a pimple on your face or not. God makes no mistakes and all the things that God creates is good ... including you.
xoxo
P.S. Here's the video that I had come across that inspired this post. HumerusFitness (Bryan), has been travelling down the road of acne and accutane for a while now and is worth the watch. I have been following him since Day 1 and a great guy to interact with in terms of skin.
